Saturday, June 19, 2010


do you know how does it feel to feel insecure all the time?

Well, I'm kind of going through that right now. maybe I'm pms-ing, but maybe I just have an irritating gut-feeling about a girl from the past. So yeah, lately, this girl has been calling my boyfriend, practically everyday, asking all these unnecessary questions where the answers are easily available from a totally different person.

She's a stewardess, I'm a student.
She was with him for 3 years, and we are going to be 16 months this 28th.
She is fair-skinned, well, I'm not.
she's soft-spoken, I'm loud.
She's smart, egoistic, and I'm blur and 'vulnerable' (so says my boyfriend)

So, you can imagine my worries when she calls him everyday, asking has he eaten, what he was up to, where can she find a place with good food. *iknow,likeWTFright?

Come on, this, coming from a girl who has a boyfriend that lives in the same area.

Why I feel so insecure, though I know I'm a better suit for my guy than she is, is because, she has the advantage of being his first gf, ever.*like,pffffft,obsessedmuch?

I'm not yet through spending my time with him, I feel ... how do you say, like the time I have with him all these months is insufficient, and I'm not able to let him go just yet. *iknowi'vegoneoverboardwiththis

I can't even see myself not being with him (for the time being). Right now, he's my best friend, my outlet, the apple of my eye. He treats me well, he jokes, he wins me over when he knows he pissed me off. He's perfect for my right-now. I don't dare to think about the future. Let's not waste my energy fussing over that, shall we?

Okay, I'm done rambling, I'm going to go off doing something to blow off steam.
Probably I'll be singing along to UKAYS, Search, Wings and Iklim.

I guess that covers it. My current state of mind; insecure and clueless.

Oh yea, P/S for the girl;
Back off my boyfriend, bitch. Watch out for Karma, we're bestfriends.

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